Firstly, regardless of what was seen or known as needed for the civic health of the population of the United States, the handling of the COVID pandemic by our government and the media was mildly atrocious – and the media and government continue to fail the citizens. That isn’t to say that back in 2020 there wasn’t a great and express need to quarantine the spread of the virus, and that people didn’t ‘‘try their best,” so to speak. It is clearer than ever, especially among our teenagers and those in their young twenties, that being removed from the social development of schools and sports over the average course of a year depending on what state they lived in, impacted their social development and well-being. Then there is the addition of masks, which hid the facial expressions of others during the months and years that followed, and the introduction of even more extreme use of tablets and online learning. 

JAMA Pediatrics compiled and reviewed the data from 29 studies, which, when combined, drew from over 88,000 children and adolescents. One in four children experienced clinically elevated symptoms of depression; one in five experienced clinically elevated symptoms of anxiety. Both of those rates were double pre-pandemic levels. Working with children myself over the course of more than a decade and even gaming online with young men in their twenties, I have spoken to too many who have never had a girlfriend in their life, nor any sort of romantic interactions. That isn’t to say celibacy is inherently wrong – but none of them say, “gee I am glad I don’t know how to talk to women." It is instead a crushing thing weighing on them. 

Men are also notoriously bad at receiving signals from women. Heck, back when I was eighteen myself and in the car with an ex-girlfriend, she played “Come On Baby Light My Fire” by the Doors over and over again for what was probably the better part of an hour as we talked about life. I kept asking myself why she kept wanting to play it. That went straight over my head back then. Now give girls masks so guys can’t even see if they smile at their joke? 

The pandemic media didn’t let up either: those who questioned the 24/7 mask mandates, even outdoors in hale northwinds, were lambasted by those who believed that it was utterly inhumane to not sleep with a mask on. The reverse was true with those who refused masks for even a moment in any circumstance. Both political sides of the media wanted ‘clicks and views’ and went to war with an opposing audience in the interest of their own viewership.

There was also the response from China and all the other countries of the world in the initial days: China did not suspend international or domestic flights from its major cities, and other countries did not suspend incoming flights from China. 

I could honestly go on about all the long-lasting and egregious cultural and historical fumbles of how the Pandemic was handled, but that isn’t what this essay is about. That is to lay the foundation for what happened in the Congressional hearing of Dr. Anthony Fauci and a discussion of what was written in his personal journal. He was Director of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases (NIAID). He played a large role in the response of the United States to the pandemic, and, for those who don’t know: Conservatives placed the poor responses and mishaps on him, as well as him actively covering up a “leak" of the COVID virus from the Wuhan Laboratory in China.  

Recently Senator Rand Paul "acquired” the private journal and emails of Dr. Anothy Fauci (how, we do not know) and then Congress called Fauci in to answer questions about the pandemic just the other day (the end of July). In these private journal entries, which are presumed to have been kept by Fauci so that one day he would publish memoirs, it can be reasonably surmised that he never intended for anyone to read them specifically. In them, he does talk about private medical details of individuals and even his intimate opinions about important people. Thus, it is reasonable to hypothesize that he is not directly lying anywhere, especially because at some points he contradicts what he said publicly. 

For example: the prevailing story, which was pushed by the media, was that the Wuhan “wet market” (uncooked and bloody animals hanging about and presented on tables) was the source of the virus jumping from animals to humans. The counter-conspiracy story was that the virus was developed in the Wuhan Laboratory and released on purpose, or by accident. In his notes (Jan 26, 2020), he wrote: 

“Now we know the market wasn’t the source, it was the amplifier.” 

Pushing the narrative he believes in, Senator Rand Paul posted that line to social media because it contradicted the story that the media pushed. He omitted the following line from Fauci’s journal: 

“Having said that, somewhere the virus jumped from animals to humans.” 

Fauci also wrote that he was on a conference call with eleven other scientists at the beginning of the pandemic when information was sparse, and only two scientists believed ‘certain’ mutations for the virus could have happened naturally, and that “intentional” insertion could have been possible. One of the first and most prominent virologists, Kristien G. Andersen, had said early on that a lab leak could have been possible. But, after studying it, he wrote (his writings shortened for the article but not taken out of context): 

"Although evidence shows that Sars-Cov2 is not a purposefully manipulated virus, it is currently impossible to prove or disprove other theories of origin…However, since we observe all Sars-Cov2 features in related coronaviruses in nature, we do not believe that any type of laboratory-based scenario is plausible here.”

In Fauci’s own journal, he wrote that he believed the virological evidence showed it was not a lab leak; however, he couldn’t even be 100% certain. His own private notes showed that, at least to his own knowledge, he was not part of some broader conspiracy, and the scientific community eventually handled enough evidence to say that it was “probably not" a lab leak, since every part of the virus is seen in nature. He, however, did lie when he told the public that he had no part in school, bar, and restaurant closings. His notes did spell out that he recommended to the mayor of New York and the governor of California to do so. Conversely, in his defense, he was against the ultra-conservative mask movement and recommendations of the CDC regarding wearing masks even outside, and it was his advice that eventually led to the end of mask mandates. 

In regard to civic public health (regardless of the future outcomes which were listed above), it seems, through his own private journal, that Dr. Fauci believed he was doing everything right and acted in good faith for the American people. However, where Republicans in Congress were able to find issue was with Fauci’s own ego in his notes, and his use of Federal resources for personal gain. 

“It is not hyperbole to say that I am the most famous and talked about in the country and one of the most recognizable person in the world.” Fauci wrote positively about the celebrities and talk shows he was hosted on during the pandemic. After writing about some of the “crazies” in America he had to deal with, he also wrote: “I am pretty safe, I believe, since the public adulation of me has been amazing." Now, I personally don’t find a crime with a man having an ego. Egos are like dogs. It's fine and reasonable to own one, but if it bites someone you have to put it down. 

During the Congressional Hearing, the likes of Senator Josh Hawley were shouting at Fauci about Fauci’s own written accounts of his ego, but then moved into emails that Hawley obtained: 

"When millions of people were dying during the depth of the pandemic, Fulkers (Fauci’s assistant) on your behalf was soliciting and gathering information for a cash award. You applied and received eight other federal awards. You turned your staff into a full-time application machine. You used eight separate federal employees on federal time using federal resources to solicit cash awards. You then had them go out to ethics agencies and ethics watchdogs and demand that you be allowed to get the money. We have it in your emails." 

Yikes. 

I suppose that ego might have gotten too big, in the end. Using federal time and resources and federal positions to solicit, or gain cash awards or gifts, is illegal under federal law. When the Republicans were livid in the hearing about Fauci using his staff to seek Federal cash awards for his work, I totally understood. After all, using one's position of power in the Federal government to advance one's own personal wealth is unethical and immoral for the President— ah, uh… I mean, just immoral for Dr. Fauci. 

The President’s family has been enriched by a billion dollars from his cryptocurrency. The President did receive a jet as a gift worth hundreds of millions of dollars, which was improved and retrofitted by the Pentagon for one billion dollars - which will remain in Trump family possession after his presidency ends. 

 There is nothing lower than a hypocrite. At their core, a hypocrite is either a liar or a tyrant. While watching the hearing, I wondered if the Senators realized just how stupid the moment looked. Not that Fauci didn’t deserve to be publicly spanked for using his subordinates and position to acquire wealth, but that because off the current state of Washington, the moment was morally hollow. 

Austin Petak is an aspiring novelist and freelance journalist who loves seeking stories and the quiet passions of the soul. If you are interested in reaching out to him to cover a story, you may find him at austinpetak@gmail.com.

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